The MakeMeThinner Support Forum

[Sarya]

The problem with moving my L&G is that it's not really feasible to have it at work. I mean sure I could make something at home and bring it in; eat it at my desk while I am working. But it's my only real meal of the day, and I hate to say it, but I don't want to eat it here at work.

I'm also much hungrier later in the day, and I need it more then than earlier.

I may eat a portion of the L&G before pilates and a portion after and see how that works.

[DogMa]

I forget other people work different hours. I've always had my L&G at my desk at work because that's where I eat dinner. It's not exciting, but it's worked for me.

[Sarya]

I'm sure I'll work out a satisfactory plan in time. So far today is going okay. it's 3pm, and I haven't had my third supplement so I'll do that now. And then when I get home make dinner. I'm having scallops so depending on how hungry I am I'll just eat one or two (I can't remember if I have three or four for the portion) and then save the rest til right after.

[Unca_Tim]

When it comes to certain topics, there no way to find a middle ground.

I'm very open to just about anything/everything, but unfortunatly, some people's beliefs don't allow them to do so.

That's why I tried to moderate the religion topic a while back, but unfortunately it still made a mess out of it.

In a public forum like this, it's better off leaving some topics alone, or someone will get offended.

Even though I'm open, but don't understand the reasoning behind some people's beliefs, I still respect their position and opinions.

[BerkshireGrl]

I'm glad we don't have that problem here. For the most part everyone seems to play nice... I just hate being reminded that many of my life's choices make me a second class citizen, and it's okay to act like I am. It's just so frustrating sometimes and one of the main reasons why I keep my mouth shut about it.

Sarya,

This forum is definitely a welcoming place. I have mentioned an ex-GF in past posts, and got nothing but support. Well, I think it was on here anyway (Is this the part where I mention my "Xena For President" bumper sticker? Hehehehe...)

In any case, you are not alone

Many different people on here with many different faiths, or agnostic or atheist, helping each other towards a common goal... maybe we need to spread this MF stuff far and wide

[alpha femme]

this board has been fairly good about sexuality.
when i was initially opening up here, a couple of people made comments that were... interesting... but most were awesome.
i'm just glad the hottest girls on the board are also the most accepting.
it reaffirms my beliefs.

[Serendipity]

I think it is so interesting that some of the people that I admire most on this forum have so totally different lifestyles than mine. What would have happened if I had closed my mind every time someone said something that was contrary to my beliefs.....wow, I would have been the loser. I'm not a biker chick, or a lesbian, or a fundamentalist or jewish, but I have true affection for those of you who are.

That is the magic of this forum, I guess. We have such a bond in one area. Is it that being overweight goes so deep into our psychi and we have such an understanding of what the other person is going through? I don't know, but whatever it is, it works for me.

Hugs to all! I love ya!

[Sarya]

I am so glad that this forum is accepting. I work with computers and the internet so you can imagine that I spend nearly all of my waking hours tooling around somewhere or another. I have joined hundreds and hundreds of mailing lists, bboards, online communities.. Most of them I end up leaving because the people there are petty with one another. Taking their frustrations out on the faceless I guess.

It is a wonderful wonderul thing that we all get along here. Or even if we don't we treat each other with respect. I think that comes as much from the administration of the boards as the people who frequent them.

Ya know there are medifast threads out there that make fun of boards like ours where we are always trying to be nice and encouraging to each other. Why shouldn't we be? We still lay it down straight when it needs to be done; we just do it with respect.

heheh that's not even what I was going to talk about!

I was looking at myself in the mirror this morning and I was tickled pink to see that my upper waistline is becoming even more defined!! A month or so ago when I looked into the mirror I could see a slight curve on my sides just below my breast line, but now here I was this morning and it's like.. half of the side line of my torso now. It still loses it as it approaches the ever shrinking muffin top but wow! I was so happy to see it! It curves INWARD. it's so neat.

My roommate was away for like a week and came home last night. He says a week away and you can really see the difference. yay!

I tried to put on an old tshirt this morning (18/20 from lane bryant). I spent about 10 minutes trying to convince myself it wasn't sooo large that I couldn't wear it. Then I realized no it actually was that large. it was not just large it was like a kid in her mommy's clothing large.

So I spent most of my life fat. I was a chubby overweight child. I danced from the time I was 5 to 16, but it wasn't until I was 11 or 12 that I started dancing like 5 days a week. By the time I was 13 I was a gangly girl with an odd looking body. You see I had a b-cup when I was 9. So I had all of the gangliness of a thin pre-teen mixed in with the odd curvy fat pockets of a menstruating woman. Then when I was 15 I cut back down severely on my dancing and went up to about 160-170. So I always pretty much always fat in my book. Ever since I was old enough to really care anyway.

It sucks to be fat. It really does. But I also realized this morning that if I gain that weight back it won't just suck; it will be devastating. I look at the changes in my body with wonder and joy. My moods are stabilizing with the help of better vitamin intake and exercise. My sleep is deeper. I look better. I don't hurt all the time... so even going from where I am now to wear I was in April is terrifying to me. It's that thing where you can't truly miss something you never had, but once you've had it..

It makes me more determined than ever. Even as I suspect my weight loss has slowed down now and will continue to be slow. At least it's still the downward slope. And in this case I think slower weightloss means more muscle. I can deal with that. As I look at my bodily changes I'm starting to have a better understanding of overweight vs. obese. I am 5.5 pounds from that 29.9 bmi number, and I can really see that.

[Lauren]

Sarya, something about what you wrote totally hit home for me. It would absolutely be devastating if we gained the weight back - it would mean that we didn't respect ourselves and love ourselves enough, you know? I know that people like to say they're "treating themselves" to some delicious cake or cookie or pasta, but when it comes to us (the overeaters of the world), we're not treating ourselves, we're sabotaging ourselves, and how sad is that?

Back on the respect and acceptance dialogue, I just think people's close-mindedness is absurd. I've never comprehended people's prejudices, where the true foundation of their intolerance comes from, and why they feel personally moved to perpetuate it. I've just never cared, as long as I like a person, think they're funny, intelligent, of good character - I respect them and call them a friend.

I do think Jo was right in that our common struggles with weight unite us, but I generally think it may run deeper. I think that our weight has put us in a perpetual place of feeling "less than" others, of feeling ostracized, of being on the periphery of what society deems acceptable. And I think that may provide a level of empathy and awareness to the struggles others confront - for whatever reason - in their lives. And let's be frank, regardless of the strides that have been made in today's society with acceptance, we are still miles away from treating all people equally, so people are still being shunned, and perhaps we (people who've also been shunned for our weight) see that in a special light.

Just my 2 cents. Okay, perhaps that was a whole dime!

Lauren

[Sarya]

There's one thing I sort of dislike about pilates. Ok maybe two.
1. I sweat like a pig. Hello did you just shower?? No I just did an hour of pilates. :P

2. My back just about level with the top of my hip bones all the way across my back is always slightly sore afterwards.

caveats:

1. I sweat like a pig doing my hair in the morning. I don't understand wtf is wrong with me related to this. I have a sneaking suspicion it has to do with the lexapro since I've been on antidepressants before that made me sweat a lot.

2. That part of my back is slightly sore after massage. It's slightly sore after sleeping sometimes. It's slightly sore at random moments.

therefore:

I don't think either one of these is very directly related to pilates; just indirectly at about the same correlation as most other activities.

Still.. #1 whatever I change my clothes and dry off but #2 sort of dampens my pilates buzz. Especially when it is accompanied by a slight tension headache.

It is my hope that over time both the sore lower back and the occasional tension headaches will lessen. I know they're due to my back problems and pilates should help that.

I feel like jello.

My former lover(?) is coming over tomorrow night before we go to club to see my roommate's band play. I'm glad. I haven't seen her in quite a while. I have this weird conflicted attraction to her. It boggles my mind. Like I am and have always been attracted to her, but in practice something weird occurs. It's a long convoluted story as to why I think these conflicted feelings arise. What I need to do is try to get the conflict part of to just fade away. We're not meant for a serious romantic relationship. I don't think we're compatible that way. But there's still a connection.

[alpha femme]

sounds like the way i feel about my date tomorrow night....
she is smokin' hot, but i know it cannot go anywhere because of this underlying feeling i have. i call it the crazy-meter. sometimes we learn to trust those.... i'm sure yours is based on some other factor, but i know how you feel about conflicted attraction.

maybe i should stay away from the fiery latinas...
nah.

have fun tomorrow; hope we both have a good night.

[Sarya]

I'm sure we will

[kendra_m]

I don't have anything real profound to say.... just that as I sit here and read journal entries, I really enjoy all of you. There are so many incredible women here! (And men...not trying to be exclusive )

Kendra

[Sarya]

I bought a new skirt to wear tonight. It's uhm... like 8 inches long?
So it's rather... mini. My roommate assures me that I need to wear it tonight as it's hot. So we'll see. I hope no one passes out when they see my thighs.

if a good picture appears I might even show you.

[DogMa]

Just wanted to pop in and tell you to have fun tonight!