Sarya

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Postby Sarya » September 27th, 2006, 5:41 am

So last night I had a private pilates class instead of the normal group one. My trainer and I focused on stretching and releasing all of the tension that built up while I was so sick. I'll tell you that stretching is one of my least favorite activities. I was lying there with my leg in the air stretching my hamstrings. My hamstrings are the tightest muscle on my body I think. It wasn't comfortable.. so I lay there trying to relax my muscles and deepen the stretch and all I could think was, "I'm paying $50 to stretch" then I thought "I need to pay $50 to stretch because I wouldn't do it this well if she wasn't standing there making me."

Back in the long dark past I was a dancer. I was very flexible, very active, etc. So maybe that's why I notice that I am so inflexible now. It's really not good for us. Our bodies will run so much better if our muscles are strong and supple. If you don't stretch before and after your workout, please consider it. It will make it so much more effective.

I wasn't going to go to pilates tomorrow, but the owner of the studio is teaching so I will. Besides, I probably should. I also need to work up a daily stretching routine. I need to make a concerted effort to fix my flexibility problem. Pilates will help, but it's not enough. Pilates is mostly focused on core strength. I always stretch before, and we do some stretches during and at the end, but I think on my off days I should have a straight out stretching program.

I've lost 4 pounds of my sick weight so far. I have 6 pounds to go to get back to my brief visit at 189 lbs. I am hoping that more of this is water weight and glycogen and will continue to leave off over the next week. I'm so behind on my goals, but wouldn't it be lovely to be "overweight" for my friends wedding? I think so. It's 10 pounds and three weeks away.
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Postby Sarya » September 28th, 2006, 5:41 am

I have this knot in my shoulder. It was worse yesterday. I wonder if I over exerted those muscles in pilates Tuesday. It's entirely possible. I stretch those muscles all the time so I may have tried to stretch a little too far.

I have pilates again today, and a little trip to the grocery store. I have been eating my bbq (lemon/oil based marinade not the tomato-y sugary bbq) chicken and broccoli all week. I am so sick of eating it. I mean, it tastes good, but variety is the spice of life! So I have to go shopping today and pick up some beef, more chicken, salad stuff, lf cheese, and sf jello. yum.

I'm going to a party Saturday night so I think I'm going to have to make up some "snack packs" for myself. I just get worried about those evening activities. Especially when I am in a place where I don't know everyone. I'm not about to pull out my shaker jar and make a shake. Not after the last time I did that and got a lot of unwelcome attention.

I'm having a hard time this week. Between the still recovering from illness (I am still coughing up stuff from my lungs and having very bad allergy attacks).. skipping my period because I messed up my dates.. then a variety of personal situations causing me a lot of mental stress.. I don't know. my head and body are giving me a run for my money.

I'm not doing too bad though. I'm sticking to plan, just eating extra protein. I'm still fighting the hunger though. I imagine I'll be well into ketosis by Saturday which is another reason for the snack packs. I don't want to unintentionally derail myself as soon as I am finally acclimating again.

The good news is that I'm down to 194 today. 2 more pounds to reach my last weekly weigh-in weight. 5 more pounds to reach my lowest weight on mf. 9 more pounds to reach my October 20th goal of being "overweight". So three weeks from today for 9 pounds. It is within the realm of possibility. I am hoping.

I need to buy a dress in two weeks for the wedding.
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Postby Sarya » September 29th, 2006, 6:03 am

What's up with this? I didn't go to pilates last night. I cancelled and instead went to my massage therapist. Apparently I had a fever through the entire massage. She had just assumed I had recently showered. I didn't know this until after the massage when one of the other ladies was putting some homeopathic sinus oils on my face and she mentioned it. It makes me wonder, because I have had a sweating problem since sometime before/around starting MF. So have I had a low grade fever off and on for months? Or is this something left over from the flu/cold/horrible thing?

Speaking of the horrible thing.. the homeopathic stuff I am using is making a noticeable difference overnight. I am not coughing as much unless I am actually expectorating, my nose is draining, I'm not sneezing. I haven't sneezed all morning! However.. I am draining lots of mucus. I have white stuff on my tonsils. Not the white stuff that strep is borne of, mind you, just like I got mucus caught in there. And it's sore. sigh.

I'm not going to the doctor though. She will just put me on antibiotics, and I don't think that is necessary at this moment.

In other news, I lost another pound. My skin has cleared up amazingly in the 5 days I have been back on plan. I mean.. I took a shower and then looked in the mirror and my skin was clear, pale, glowing, and smooth looking. By contrast, last week this time it was blotchy, flushed, dull, and bumpy in spots.

I am struggling to stay on plan (I AM staying on plan though. Albeit with extra protein added in, lower carb supplements, and soy crisps). Something about those comments in the ER really messed with my head I think. Not to mention that my ex-husband just had his first child with his new wife. I _know_ that is messing with me. I'm happy for them. I really am. I don't want to be with him. It was the best decision I ever made to leave. The problem is that I did that thing that young women do and I put all of my hope and dream eggs in one basket. Apparently watching him do something I don't think I'll ever get a chance to do really bothers me on some level. That was supposed to be me after all.

edit: ok I fell off. I was feeling really sick and had a sandwich which helped a lot.

I have been toying with doing one of the other plans instead of the 5&1. The diabetic plans have more solid food and a wider variety. Then there is a 3&2 model.

I know I will lose slower if I use one of the higher calorie plans, but I am just not in the right mindset for all of the liquid food. I don't know. Maybe I'm just sick of eating the same things for the past 5 months.

...

The unfortunate thing is that my doctor won't have any better suggestions for me. She's not a nutrition specialist and has thusfar deferred to the medifast program literature. So if I go to her and say I want to follow one of the diabetic plans or the 3&2 she's just going to say yes.

My insurance won't cover an actual nutritionist to talk to these things about because I am not actually diabetic.

At least I have a pretty decent knowledge of nutrition having spent the entirety of my teenage and young adult years going to nutritionists and being on diets.

And I would hope that alterations to my plan are either temporary or prove to help me continue losing weight. The big differences I see with the other plans are higher calories and more solid food which I think fit both of my requirements.

When I started on Medifast I pretty much spent my life on my butt. But now I walk around a lot more, I exercise for an hour at least three times a week, I do lower impact pilates exercises and stretches on my off days.

I have no desire to ditch the diet. I have no desire to switch completely to some other type of diet.

I know how hard core we all are about medifast. I am too! I'm irritated that I have to consider this option, but it's better than just stopping. I have huge amounts of respect for those of you who have managed to go through this diet without going off plan, without having these troubles. I wish I could be like you.

I wonder if the sweating has something to do with the soy intake. Even before medifast I ate soy, but definitely not this much. Since soy has phytoestrogens (?) in it, I guess it could cause hot flashes (which is essentially what I mean when I say sweating). *shrug on that one*


gah. I am frustrated.
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Postby Sarya » October 4th, 2006, 8:52 am

I caved and went to the doctor today. I have a lingering infection and will be taking two z-paks in a row to kill it. Oh joy. Still this explains why I've still been feeling kind of gross and out of it.

Despite my inability to get back on plan I have been holding steady following the transition and maintenance guildelines. I am and will continue to go to pilates 2-3 times a week and stretch every evening.

I still have every intention of getting back on plan. I just wanted you all to know I am here, and I am reading.
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Postby DogMa » October 4th, 2006, 9:38 am

I'm so sorry you're still feeling ill. And I sure understand your frustration and confusion; I went through a lot of the same things - and am still going through them - when trying to balance Medifast and exercise. It's why I switched to maintenance early and why I'm STILL concerned that I'm not getting enough calories.

I'd say just do what you can for now, until you're 100 percent again. Maybe even boost your calories temporarily with the 3&2 or something to give your body a little extra fuel to use for healing itself.

Hang in there!!
Robin

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Postby Sarya » October 4th, 2006, 12:13 pm

Do you know what makes it most frustrating? They put dance mirrors up in the pilates studio so when we're doing certain exercises on the reformer we can see ourselves. I was mortified to see how barrel-like I looked in the mirror compared to the skinny minny exercising next to me. I still had better form :P I have to hold on to something. My face is getting thinner even though I've been holding steady hovering around 194-195.
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Postby Sarya » October 10th, 2006, 11:56 am

One thing I have noticed while not on plan is that I still _want_ sugary and starchy things more than is ok. In fact, if I eat them I do indeed crave more. Horrid cycle that is. I'm wondering what I should do about this sometimes overwhelming want (not willing to call it a need) for stuff I shouldn't have. I mean.. despite all the sick that I've been dealing with I'd be losing weight right now if the sugary starchy hell didn't find it's way to my mouth. As it is I am bouncing up and down within 5 pounds of my official last weigh-in.

I have another week of antibiotics then the travel wedding weekend. After that, with some hot spots, I am planning to get back on plan.

But the mental craving thing: I need to do something about it. I just don't know what. Sometimes just telling myself no isn't enough. I've gone to cognitive behavioural therapy before for other things. I suppose it's an (expensive) option for this but.. what have some of you done to get over it? Or was it not much of a problem?

...

I got frustrated at pilates last night. Last week I pulled one of my muscles while exercising. It's one of my "groin" muscles. Specifically it's a muscle along my right inner thigh. It's definitely torn. I have to go out of my to avoid stretching it or straining it because of where it is. So between that stopping me from doing a bunch of exercises and an overall weakness from the illing and antibiotics.. I couldn't even do short spine last night. I got so frustrated. short spine is my favorite exercise and I couldn't even get on to my shoulders.


And I found a dress to wear to the wedding. It's a nice off the shoulder velvet boned top with a satin collar and a chiffon ankle length skirt. I couldn't believe how hard it was to find something though. Size 16 is an inch too small to zip at my breast line and size 18 rarely exists. I love this dress though. It's absolutely gorgeous, and I have every intention of getting it altered before my cruise next October so I can wear it then as well.
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Postby DogMa » October 10th, 2006, 2:12 pm

That's great on the dress. As for the carbs, all I can say is what helped/helps me. When I was on the program, I stayed away from them. Now, I eat "bad" carbs like sugar and pasta only once a week and limit carbs the rest of the time. I also try to eat carbs only with protein, which might help you. I've found I do a lot better that way than if I have JUST carbs at any time.

Like garlic bread with pasta leads to cravings and usually sugar. Garlic bread with a salad and grilled chicken, not nearly so bad.
Robin

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Postby Sarya » October 17th, 2006, 7:21 am

Ah. So this week is the first real week of PMS since I went off plan. Can you say BLOAT?? As in, holy crap, where did all of this come from?? Right before the wedding too. sigh. I'm looking forward to getting back on plan after the trip. I'm nervous about it, but cmon, I've done it before I can do it again. I don't know why I'm so worried about being able to stick to it. Maybe it's the weather. I hate the cold weather. Also my cravings have been insane. I've had chocolate every day.

Soon.. and just in time for vanilla pudding and beef stew. cool. I hope the beef stew is yummy.
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Postby Sarya » October 23rd, 2006, 5:45 am

As planned, it is Monday morning, and I am back on plan (with a vengeance). I made a big decision last night that has me nervous, and I keep second guessing myself and waffling. Truth is, it's a good decision. (It has nothing to do with food). I hope that being nervous and on the tail end of my period doesn't make this week any harder with regards to acclimating to the plan. I would have preferred to do this over a weekend, but well it is October and that would be even harder.

So here we go. back on the wagon.
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Postby Sarya » October 24th, 2006, 7:14 am

Yesterday didn't go too poorly. I was off and on hungry all day, but I stuck pretty much to plan. I say pretty much because my L&G consisted of leftover meat and veggies from the cheesecake factory. I'm fairly certain that there had to be at least something not so perfect in the meal, but overall it was fine. I had thrown away the mashed potatos so they wouldn't tempt me, and I didn't have any snacks or extras.

Today I am hungry again, but I will work through it. It's hard. I'm tempted to cancel on pilates for the rest of the week which would make two weeks without it, but I'm somewhat concerned about exercising on day 2 of getting back on plan. I don't know what to do. I'm also very tired.

I had a very nice date last night.
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Postby DogMa » October 24th, 2006, 9:24 pm

Welcome back! How was the wedding?

Probably a bit extra fat and salt in the restaurant food, but otherwise I'm sure it was fine. You'll be back in the swing of things in no time.
Robin

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Postby Sarya » October 25th, 2006, 7:06 am

The wedding was great. I had a wonderful time, and quite a few people didn't recognize me at first! Everyone loved my outfit :) And I saw my ex-husband with his wife and new baby. It was awkward at first, but then fine. (with the help of wine I will admit).

Monday I did fine on plan with just the slight exception of eating the leftovers.

Yesterday I messed up in the evening with some cheese and nuts. I was pretty much ok with eating the cheese, but I got a bit annoyed with myself over the nuts. I woke up at 6am with horrible horrible bathroom issues *ugh*, but they now seem to be cleared up. I haven't had another incident since this morning.

I've lost 5 pounds over the last two days. I really think I have about 5 more of water weight, but I guess we'll see. My smallest jeans are fitting again. Last week with my pms I had bloated up and they were uncomfortable.

I'm not going to pilates at all this week. I think it's a recipe for failure. I'll go back next week. I figure by then I should be acclimated well enough to take a class or two without wanting to eat my arm again.
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Postby Sarya » October 26th, 2006, 2:11 pm

So far so good.. I feel like I have gotten over the initial hump that happens within the first week. I don't necessarily think I'm in ketosis yet, but I'm not going insanely hungry and wanting to eat everything in sight as much as say.. Monday or Tuesday.
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Postby Sarya » November 8th, 2006, 11:16 am

Well.. me too. I haven't said anything, but I haven't been able to get back on program. Work/life is just so stressful for me right now. I'm telling you I just can't deal with it all. The thought of sitting down to a nice meal, taking that time out, enjoying the chew and the flavors and the textures.. it really helps me not explode when everything around me is so hectic.

I also have a problem that I think I thought would go away miraculously as I lost weight. I binge. When I was compliant with MF I was okay. I wasn't bingeing. But when I added real food back in, poof look at that.. bingeing to the right of me, bingeing to the left. :P

I think it is within my best interests to take what I've learned while on MF and apply it to a different diet. At least for now. I need to work within the bounds of real food and learn how to fight the urge to binge.

I still have well over a month of left over food that I'm not sure what to do with. I have ideas of coming back to MF, but I don't know when. I just know that right now it's not working for me.
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