Back on Medifast, but disgusted with myself...

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Back on Medifast, but disgusted with myself...

Postby xcarbonmadex » September 23rd, 2007, 9:44 am

Hi all,

Well, almost exactly two years ago, I reached my goal weight of 150lbs from 258lbs, and boy, did it feel good. Fast forward to today, and I weigh 228lbs (this is after three weeks back on Medifast, so who knows what I got back up to). I had been able to keep myself under 200lbs for the first year...but I don't know what happened and I lost control of my eating habits. I went back to not eating all day, and then stuffing myself when I got home from work. I had started and stopped Medifast a number of times during the last two years and somehow never got my mind in the right place to do it again for very long. Three weeks ago, I started again. I was doing great and I was so motivated...until yesterday. I ate enough food in one sitting for at least two people...stuff I never usually crave. I am so upset with myself. I don't know why I'm doing this. It was so easy the first time. I'm back on track today, but constantly scared I won't reach my goal because I feel I lack all control sometimes. I wasn't even hungry. Any advice from those doing this thing a second time? I feel better getting this out of my head. Thanks for listening,
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Postby big ron » September 23rd, 2007, 9:56 am

Nico you are not alone. I too lost and went back to old habbits. You cant go back in time just have to move forward and try again. Never Give Up. Keep posting and know we all slip. Good luck and I hope we see less of you in the coming weeks(if you know what I mean) Ron :hug:
Restart 9-10-2007
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Postby Petunia » September 23rd, 2007, 10:38 am

I too have started again after gaining about 35-40 pounds, and unlike you, I never reached my goal. Restarting has certainly been a son of a gun!! I have had several restarts and failures in the past 3 months, but sometime in September, I got serious again.

This go round I have stayed away from the scale, so when slip, I don't feel bad. I feel good when I stay on plan (rather than when I lose a pound). The scale has become less important, since I know from past experience that Medifast works when I stick with it. I'll eventually get back to weighing myself routinely, to help me keep the weight off in maintenance and forever.

Folks here are absolutely fantastic; you are not alone. Good luck!!
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Postby nickieluv » September 23rd, 2007, 2:01 pm

I hesitate to recommend this, because I have not always liked hearing it from others - but have you ever seen a counselor? I've 'seen the light' in terms of talking to someone about eating issues - and even if he/she says you are normal and are trying to regain control and don't have any kind of serious disorder, that in itself is valuable information.

I went through a rough couple of months so technically I'm a restarter myself, even though I never officially left the program and certainly did not get anywhere near goal. I can relate to binge eating, to starving yourself all day only to 'make up for it' later, and even to eating tons of food when you're not even hungry. When I saw my counselor she asked if anything major was going on in my life that I might be stressed about. So maybe a simple thing to do would be to build time into your day to relax, time for yourself. Easy to say, but hard to do, I know.

Keep moving forward, one meal and one day at a time - you can do this!
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Postby holberry » September 23rd, 2007, 7:03 pm

Have you tried just hanging out here on the forums.? Lots of good support
and dont look back, it's a new day :yes:
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Postby Tawanda » September 24th, 2007, 9:13 am

Don't be disgusted with yourself, be proud that you are back at the challenge of getting the extra weight off. HB is right....spend time here at the forums and you'll be encouraged & challenged by others.

Glad you are here!
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Postby xcarbonmadex » September 24th, 2007, 12:32 pm

Hi guys,

Thanks for the encouragement and support. I am definitely feeling better and on track again.

Petunia - I am staying away from the scale as much as possible too. I realized it was driving me crazy, and partially leading me to cheat because I was trying to get some kind of reaction out of it, when I didn't see change day to day. Now it's once every 3-4 weeks (which is why I have no idea what I was when I started. I only know my clothes feel a lot better right now).

Nickieluv - Funnily enough, I AM a counselor. Though not for food related issues. Thanks for suggestion. It is something I am considering, though I am going to try to work on this myself unless I keep hitting these same difficulties over and over. You're right that I probably have some issues here.

Big Ron, Holberry, and Tuwanda, thanks for your kind words. I'm going to come to the forums more often, even if just to read how you all are doing. It's comforting.

Best to all,
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Postby nickieluv » September 24th, 2007, 2:40 pm

Well, being a counselor, of course you know how helpful you are!

I'm in the middle of a book on binge eating - and mostly what I'm discovering is that I don't qualify as a binge eater, just an overeater or an emotional eater. Oddly, I sometimes wish I could be 'labeled' and 'fixed' but it looks like I'll just have to keep truckin' on my own! MF does teach you things, even if it seems like you're not eating real food most of the time.

Good job backing away from the scale, too. For a long time the number I saw controlled my day - now it's just information. Never thought I would say that! But, I still have to weigh every day and I feel odd on days when I forget.
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Postby hulagirlfromhawaii » September 24th, 2007, 4:38 pm

Hey Nico! Welcome back! You are not alone on the comeback trail. Been there and still struggling. It is sooo much harder to restart. But the forum is a great place to be. You're doing great! Keep shakin! :cheermed:

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Postby LAwoman » September 24th, 2007, 5:18 pm

Hi Nico,

Welcome back from another RERERERE...starter :oops:

I understand and can relate to the feelings of being upset and how difficult it is to get back into the MF groove. Just look at how my restart posts I have. :shock:

Let's start with the positives though:
*You know MF works, 'cause you worked it in the past and it worked successfully for you.
*Instead of just throwing in the towel, you returned to something you know works
*You're proactively taking steps towards better health by coming back to MF for a healthier you
*You're here at this forum, sharing your experience, and learning from others to help you succeed.

I'm sure there are more, those are just a few off the top of my head.

It is harder to restart Nico, not 100% sure why??? Maybe we know how well it works, so we can just put it off and do it later, knowing eventually we'll be successful at it, at least that's my latest thinking. But I don't want to put it off any longer and eventually be fit, I want it now.

A few things that have helped me this time:
*I'm trying really hard to not compare how I did last time (ie, by this time I had lost this much, so by next month...)
*I'm just taking one day at a time to be MF compliant.
*I gave myself a 100 day challenge, as an initial motivator to stay compliant.

Whatever you try, I'm glad you're back, and look forward to hear how well you do.
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Postby Jan » September 24th, 2007, 8:45 pm

Hi There,
I myself have never been a big fan of the scale. :cry: It can be very very problematic. :cry: Our weight can be different at different times during the day. Plus, we are very very susceptible to water weight fluctuations. The scale can really discourage us. You know... oh well... I've done it now... :? I might at well just eat... and start again tomorrow. On the other hand some may be tempted to "reward" themselves with a foody treat when they see a nice loss. So....I say stay away.. you'll know.. your clothes will be getting looser and looser. Every three weeks on the scale sounds great to me and is just what I do. Just remember you are getting healthier and healthier each day you are on program.
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Postby Mike » September 24th, 2007, 8:49 pm


This is the best thing that you can do for yourself. Follow the plan, lean on your support system, and drink your water.... ;)

Also, make sure to register on here so you have access to all areas available. (little button on the bottom right). 8)
Pre WLS 460
Low after WLS 300
Start of MF 350
Previous MF low 280
Restart MF 330

I have to be careful not to confuse excellence with perfection. Excellence, I can reach for; perfection is God's business.
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Hi there!

Postby Hoosierdaddy » September 25th, 2007, 6:04 am

Everyone gave you such good advice. I'm a new poster and I've only been on MF since June 3rd of this year, but the one thing that keeps me motivated is...waking up every day being proud of myself with no regrets. I was really unhappy when I let myself down, and I started each day feeling empty and regretful. NOW, I wake up feeling happy because I am back in control.

I don't know if I explained it right, but for me, nothing tastes as good as my feelings of accomplishment, or my pride in knowing that I'm ruling my own life now.

Just get back in there, and don't let past failures matter now! Keep reading here, because I stay inspired from all the other people who post here!
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Postby Lizabette » September 27th, 2007, 8:08 pm

NICO, Welcome back.
Take are not alone on this journey.
Lizabette :heart:
195/135 - Reached goal, Aug. 31, '06
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All is well

Postby xcarbonmadex » September 28th, 2007, 10:49 am

Hi everyone. I want to thank you all again for your wonderful support. It gave me the strength to forget what I had done and just move on. I actually ended up with a four pound loss since my original message. Now the scale is out of my sight for the next few weeks and I'm just going to focus on the program and not the scale. I even bought myself an expensive little gift to aid me along...a Bamix hand blender (I have one at home which I adore above everything else except the Vitamix, but got myself one for work too). I also found that someone else at my clinic has been on Medifast too, so we have been able to talk..and even trade packets when we brought something we weren't in the mood for.
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