The MakeMeThinner Support Forum

[Marseilles]

I sit here reading posts today..as I have everyday for months. The difference is, gone is the fire. I used to sit here and post alongside everyone else that had the 'medifast fire' burning deep within them. Such resolve. Such determination. Such desire to succeed. Such camaraderie.

Of this I am certain: Do your VERY best not to waiver from the program even once. It is MUCH harder than you can possibly imagine, trying to get back on track.

Of this I am also certain: OLD HABITS DIE HARD.

I digress..firstly, a HUGE congratulations to all those of you that are doing so well on medifast and dont get me wrong. I am a huge proponent of the program. It will not fail you, as long as you are faithful to it. It is good to see so many new faces and new voices, I hope that your enthusiasm is contagious.

Old friends, a fond hello. I hope you are all well, I check in on you all often and wish nothing but the best for everyone here...may your successes be beyond your wildest imagination!

That being said, I am going to take the opportunity to use this as a sounding board. Thanks in advance, this will obviously be lengthy...

A little background...

Ive read Carrie's post today, as well as all the responses from Tami and Mike and everyone else..and I am very sympathetic. Life is often times so overwhelming and convoluted that I find myself just standing and scratching my head...so much of what everyone has said rings true for me as well..but where to begin...

Being a fellow Floridian, lets just say it has been a sketchy week.. Everything that Carrie has described is very accurate, it leaves alot of uncertainties and lays bare alot of fears. Lives hang in the balance and it really causes one to stop and take stock. In addition to the fears of hurricane Charlie last Friday and his projected path, (thankfully it missed where I am too, best thoughts and prayers with those that were less fortunate), my proverbial rug has been pulled from beneath me. The condensed version is this:

In the past six weeks, the company my husband works for changed management which left his job security shakey. As a matter of self preservation, he decided to look at other options. His employer heard wind of the fact that he was looking elsewhere and fired him on the spot. As we are not citizens of this country, that put his work VISA in jeopardy and it was questionable how long we would be able to remain in the US. We just purchased a home which we have had to put on the market as although he was able to find other employment it is in a different city. Our closest security net is 3000 miles away. I could go on..there is actually more. But why bother? I think you get the idea.

When all of this transpired, my resolve went flying out the window and I took solace in the creature comforts we are all guilty of abusing. Food and drink. And to think my biggest beef prior to this was hairloss. hairloss had me in a state of panic..so trivial, now. (For the record, I dealt with the hairloss and now wear my hair short as opposed to waistlength)

Anyways..Ive lost sight of my goal currently..I just dont have the determination to even try right now. Im still lurking, still reading..but mostly Im an ostrich. My head is in the sand. Hopefully things pick up, cause Im kind of at wits end.

Thanks for listening, it occurs to me how little point there is to this post aside from venting..but I hope to be back. i just dont really have the strength or will right now...

What do ya do.....

[explorthis]

What do ya do.....

Easy, but not easy. You realize that the board (me too) are here for you. We miss you and your great posts. Realize we are here to lean on, vent with, and just chit-chat idly.

Though we can wish you well, we obviously cannot (though I wish I could) help you through the employment part.

I agree, old habits die hard, and this is probably something that shall haunt us for ever. Will the world ever know the Tootsie roll center deal?

Anywho, point is, we are here, I am here.

Best of luck to you, and your family.

-Mike

[hawaiiwhatnot]

Dear Marseilles,

My heart goes out to you. I too wish there were something I could do for you. Like Mike, I'm here to listen. Don't lose confidence in yourself. You'll deal with the weight issue when it's time. You've done it before and you can do it again when you're ready. For heavens sakes, everyone would have very serious feelings of despair if their sense of security was suddenly yanked out from under them! I'm including you in my prayers to stay positive and to have faith and trust that everything will work out. I'm sure you're doing the best you can right now, so don't beat yourself up over your weight loss. We will make it there when we are ready and only then. Just try to take good care of yourself during this extremely trying time, and may God bless...

Camille

[TamiL]

Marsellies
U will get back on track...I relate to so much of your post..If I could go back to my early medifast days...I would change so much..of course never "wander" off to the land of the 'Feelin good about me..people are noticing im loosing weight..i can eat a little of this and a little of that world"
I would have stayed with my butt planted in my chair every night and every morning before I would leave..reading posts and being a part of everyones losses...celebrating with them and offering advice...never straying from the forum....cuz it helped me so much.
for the last few months..I have been up and down so much...good one day...bad the next....old habits die hard is SO RIGHT. I have that habit of saying "well I blew it today, may as well eat everything under the sun and start tommorrow"....then its tommorrow..and its the same old story...
but this morning I asked myself...where would I be RIGHT now if I had stuck to the program? I would have been at my GOAL..I know it...I would have been enjoying this summer instead of hiding myself...isolating myself as I sometimes do....
Im going on a trip to Italy with my family in 7 weeks...I know that If I can get thru these next few days..which will lead into weeks...sticking to this program again...I will loose the weight I put back on and I will at least feel better about myself in time for the trip....then that is the tricky part...Italy...carrying Medifast shakes...hummmmmmmmm...
but you know what? I want that EUPORIA I had in the beginning...I want that feeling that I had when I felt my clothes getting bigger and I felt my body getting smaller....feeling healthier...and if carrying medifast shakes around Italy will give me that...then so be it.
all I know is that looking back to those glorified medifast days..I was happy..I was on my way to thinville....and knew it.

YES..we derailed my shakin friend...but YOU CAN GET BACK ON THAT TRAIN....just dont give up and in all together....
HOP back on this train with me....my GLORY days are going to be here...cuz IM not giving up on this...lurk around as much as you need to...just dont go away!! I ordered some new flavored shakes and stuff to "start a new"...and figured I would start again with some new flavors I never had...and it will seem "new" again...
no..it wont be like it was before slipping...but it will WORK again if I stay faithful!!
Hang in there...things will get better!!

Tami

[Nancy]

Marsellies, you dear dear lady ~ You are going through a trial by fire it seems and we are holding you close in our thoughts and prayers. Circumstances may be nasty right now but let’s not allow them to become a license to over eat. Gather together all the things you have learned while Medifasting and put them to full use right now. Eat every three hours; drink plenty of that good ol’ clear beverage - water and stick with your plan.

There is a kind of pleasant bondage - the kind that develops between friends or among life partners – the kind where one is always there for one another, through thick and thin - and then there are bonds that must be broken.

Cling fast to that which is good. Let go of that which keeps you from doing your good Medifast work.

“It is good to regret missed opportunities but quite wrong to be miserable about them…the thing that matters first of all, is not what you once were but what you are now.” Corrie Ten Boom

Be resolved to go forth from now and do all you can to make the rest of this day, this week, this month, this year to count for good.

We have not had an easy life and have experienced some situations and been on some unpleasant journeys. We never prayed for easier lives but for strength equal to the tasks at hand.

Don’t feed your troubled heart and mind with things that come in boxes, between bread slathered with mayonnaise, things packaged with a shelf life of five years but rather feed on things that are good and excellent, things that are true and right, spend time with people who will encourage you and help you.

We will all have tribulations – some of you have recently been through one, some are just now experiencing one like Marseille and some of you will experience one in the very near future. The problems we experience become part of the embroidery of our life.

If I could, I would wipe out the years of fatness in my life. Had I not experienced the hurts, the pain, the self-loathing and grief, I would not be as passionate about helping you today.

I had something very terrible happen to me 38 years, 10 months and 11 days ago. Now it has affected me tremendously and I used to use IT as an excuse fro becoming a Foody. I needed to Get Over It. Nothing anyone else could do or say would ever make IT be erased from my memory banks. I could not change the circumstances either.

I could live as if IT didn’t happen and I tried that for a long time – sort of squashed it down deep and tried to cover it up with cheesecake, burgers, fries and candy but IT was still there.

I could accept the fact that IT did happen, get really cheesed and seek revenge and allow anger and grub to rule me. Tried that and it didn’t seem to change the circumstances other than I became a teeth clencher and gained a lot flabbage.

I could accept the fact that IT did happen, that it was an unpleasant unfortunate evil thing and move on with life. That’s what I chose to do – it took me a while to get there – but I did get there and by then I was so out of control with food, that I didn’t know how to dig my way out of the candy wrappers and empty microwave popcorn bags.

Then along came a long cool shake named Medifast and it saved my life!

There are times we WANNA be outta control with food. There are times we wanna be in control of what we eat.

Only you know where you are in all of this.

We have the product, we have the Forum Family Circle and we have the tools and support but it’s really up to you to decide what you’re gonna do in the midst of your tribulations.

Here's a smile bringer (I hope)

"When women are depressed they either eat or go shopping. Men invade another country."
-Elayne Boosler-

[Carrie]

Dear M-
I'm sorry to hear of your problems - for lack of a better way to express myself "What a crock!" Sometimes the biggest challenges of my life turn into the biggest blessings of my life - I hope that is the case for you and your family's situation right now.

I wish I had the answers for you - but right now I feel like the one without a clue. I, like you, have been searching within myself for the way to keep going.

One thing I have been noticing is that way of life, this way I 'take care of myself' is very self-destructive. I force quantities of non-nutritious food into my body over and over again. My body responds by feeling poorly. It's hard for me to get up in the morning and I feel blah all day. My sleep is troubled.

For me, I have to grow up and face reality.

I AM NOT TAKING CARE OF MYSELF. I am slowly, by degrees, destroying my body and I am harkening to the call of food like a heroin junkie runs to the needle. I don't mean to be melodramatic but this has become a life or death situation for me. If I don't stop this I am going to kill myself - with a heart attack or diabetes, ar any other number of disease that I am courting by eating this way.

This way of eating has no place in my life. How many of us would allow our children to be so mal-nourished? I've become mad over the past couple days. Mad at myself for caring so little that I would mistreat my body this way. I must learn to override the 'addict' voice in my head, the one that wants me to keep 'using', and I have to replace it with a more mature, healthy one.

I was mad at myself through the whole hurricane - for eating junk. There's no reason why I couldn't have stuck to my MF program. The hurricane was an excuse, just like every other reason I use is an excuse. I think right now, this is about personal responsibility, and accepting my responsibility to take care of myself - no matter what.

You know when I started this program all I could think about was losing the weight - I didn't worry about what I'd do when I got there - but these last days of bingeing have made me realize that it's about a lot more than the diet. My old way of eating has no place in a healthy life. It's gotta change. I've got to let go of that old self and commit to the new one.

And that's where a lot of my problem has been. I've loved losing what I have, and loved wearing the smaller clothes, but I've also wanted and needed to go back and visit the old self to get comfort from the 'storm'. I am doggedly marching forward on the MF highwire, but still insist on wearing the 'old way' safety belt. I think the only way for me to continue is to not use the safety belt anymore. It's broken anyway.

Have you ever heard the story about a group of pygmies that eat monkeys as a part of their diet? They make a precisely sized small hole in a gourd, hollow it out, tie it to a stake and fill it with fruit that the monkeys like. The monkey comes along, sticks his hand in and grabs the fruit, but can't get his clenched fist back out through the hole. The pygmies approach but the monkey won't give up the fruit to save his life, he won't let go. So the pygmies catch him and eat him. Folks, I am that monkey. My little fist is clenched doggedly around my old bingey life, despite the fact that it's not good for me. And I'm gonna have to accept the fact that it's one or the other. I can let go of the junk food and get away and live or I can get klunked on the head and roasted. Wellll, ok something like that. All kidding aside, it's a very fitting analogy - I simply can't have my 'fruit' and eat it too. I can't use this Medifast program only to return to my old eating habits. So I'm gonna have to let go of the old life, once and for all, and start taking care of myself and my body in a healthy way.

M., I don't know if any of that will help you - but please know I'm here for you - I truly believe we can do this, we can change our lives. But we might have to leave some old habits and baggage (ie fruit filled gourds) behind.

Carrie

[Nancy]

Carrie, right on!

So many times in my past DIEting experiences, I DENIED and DIEted to a particular weight and then once I reached daid eight, it was gangbusters all over again. The Flab returned, the joy, interest in life, the self-esteem, etc. exited.

Perhaps now you've reached your crisis moment like I did - Yes! It IS a life or death situation.

In some ways for me, I stopped being SELFish. I truly think when I filled my chops with food I was being self-willed and SELFish - cared more for my self than I did for my family and others - I was slowly harming myself - really killing myself. When I began MF, I began to care more for my self and care more about others - I wanted to be around for them and to be with them.

I dunno. I can't think today. Sat at the computer ALL day for two days and I am about THUNK out.

Hope today goes well for you, Carrie. Every moment this day choose what is good and right for youself. Weight loss is dying to the old wrong way of thinking, every day.