Diet Humor

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Diet Humor

Postby Nancy » July 11th, 2005, 6:18 pm

My friend from High School sent this to me and thought #2 & 3 were a riot...


The Washington Post publishes a yearly contest in which readers
are asked to supply alternate meanings for various words.

The following were some of this year's winning entries:

1. Coffee (n.), a person who is coughed upon.

2. Flabbergasted (adj.), appalled over how much weight you
have gained.

3. Abdicate (v.), to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.

4. Negligent (adj.), describes a condition in which you absentmindedly answer the door in your nightie.

5. Lymph (v.), to walk with a lisp.

6. Gargoyle (n.), an olive-flavored mouthwash.

7. Flatulence (n.) the emergency vehicle that picks you up after you are run over by a steamroller.

8. Balderdash (n.), a rapidly receding hairline.

9. Testicle (n.), a humorous question on an exam.

10. Rectitude (n.), the formal, dignified demeanor assumed by a proctologist immediately before he examines you.

11. Circumvent (n.), the opening in the front of boxer shorts.
Nothing tastes as good as thin feels...
The Formerly FLABulous and Now very Fabulous
Nancy Pettit
267/130
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Nancy
Certified Health Advisor - #130 Club
Certified Health Advisor - #130 Club
 
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Joined: July 2nd, 2003, 11:32 am
Location: Vancouver, WA

Postby martha » July 11th, 2005, 9:12 pm

Nancy--

Funny-- I think they are great!!!--thanks--always looking for a good laugh--Martha
Started MF-4/18/2005
MELTING THE POUNDS AWAY!!!!!!!!
267.5/189.5/130
martha
Preferred Member - 70# Club
 
Posts: 835
Joined: May 8th, 2005, 1:39 pm
Location: mississippi


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