The MakeMeThinner Support Forum

[Karli]

WOOOOOO HOOOOOOOO, Diana !!

I have been in some kind of funk on and off for the past two days... and reading your most recent post was *SO* helpful !! Thanks for sharing your insights and your honesty with us... I think it helps you, but it also does worlds of good for us who need it to read.

Thanks and best wishes to you,
Karli

[dede4wd]

Di,
If anyone can get through this...you can! You're one of the toughest divas I know! I wish I had the magic words, but "what do you want" sounds good! This is a tough time, I know you'll be back in the "medi-zone" soon! You've had a lot to deal with lately! I know you're going to do great! Besides, Who else am I going to chase into the 100# club?

DeDe

[TonyR]

Di, you and Mike are doing great and know what to do! But here's a new phrase for you....Don't do like cows do and that is "grazing". I have had to learn that with this program too!! I have caught myself many times doing that, and then I sit back and think....why in the world am I sabbatoging myself by doing this. If you catch yourself "grazing" then you need to think about what you need to be doing. Laundry, stepping on the treadmill for 20 minutes, some chores....etc, etc... I hope this helps, and I don't mean the cow thing in a disrespectful way, just making a metaphor!! You guys can do it! Just look at the finish line and remember that this program is for a season until you hit your goal, and during this time you just have to make that one commitment just like your commitment to Christ!! Hang in there and !!!

[Diana]

Thanks for the encouragement, guys. Part of the reason I posted it was because I know it's been a common struggle. Tony, you are my rock in this area! Karli and Dede, let's lock arms and do this thing!

*****************

Great NSV last night, similar to Dede's friends walking past her at the restaurant...

Mike and I were at the staff party last night which was held at a new staff member's home. Mike was inside and I wandered outside (unbelievable view of upper bay!!). Val, a recently retired teacher from our district and husband to Nancy with whom Mike and I teach, was outside, too, among other people. We've all known each other for at LEAST 9 years.

I greeted Val and asked a few friendly questions to which I got rather cool, detatched answers. I decided something wasn't right (maybe he wasn't feeling well), so I ended the conversation with, "I'm glad you came. It's good to see you," and wandered over to another group.

Nancy, the wife, eventually meandered outside, too, and joined the group I was in, standing right next to me. We were both dressed in new red and black outfits (not matching, but both looking rather easy on the eyes ) so we commented and hammed a bit.

When the moment seemed appropriate, I quietly asked Nancy if Val was ok. After a brief exchange, Nancy left our circle.

Suddenly, I heard Nancy call, "DI!" I spun around. Nancy was standing there with a grin, part I-told-you-so, part inside joke, and Val was trying to recoil his jaw from the ground. "He didn't recognize you."

Mind you, I was just at their house in September.

[dede4wd]

That's so awesome Di! I think we should keep going and get WAY more of these NSV's!

DeDe

[Karli]

hee hee... Di, this is hilarious !! I can just imagine this scenario. Val has in his mind the married male alarms sounding off "oh no, hot woman talking to me. Must remember, I am married. I am married. I am married. Mustn't talk too friendlyish with hot woman. Remain calm. Give short answers. Everything will be fine."

YES, let's lock arms and not let any red-rovers come on overs . Okay, I am feeling just plain goofy ! But, we *will* do this together. I really believe in you, Di.

Thanks for sharing, that is great !

Karli

[Mike]

hee hee... Di, this is hilarious !! I can just imagine this scenario. Val has in his mind the married male alarms sounding off "oh no, hot woman talking to me. Must remember, I am married. I am married. I am married. Mustn't talk too friendlyish with hot woman. Remain calm. Give short answers. Everything will be fine."

Karli

And yes.... my wife is hott!!!

[Sojourner]

And yes.... my wife is hott!!!

How cute are the two of you?? Very!!

Awesome NSV, Diana - congrats!

[Diana]

oh, gosh, Sojo!

***********

(long, full-bodied sigh of wearied resignation with gildings of relief)

Tomorrow starts Winter Break (previously Christmas Break). The kids weren't that bad, and our principal arranged for it to be a minimum day, so the darlings went home an hour and a half earlier than usual.

Medifastingly speaking, it was a horrible day. But I think there are times when the efforts of 12-year-olds (and their families) need to be honored. I have many families who made dishes to send in for our class' pot luck and I sampled all of them. (Those of you who know CA Ed Code, yes, I know, that's not allowed...If you have an issue with it, then on your behalf I feel appropriately chastised.)

I let the kids manage the whole thing -- they voted on a "manager" who kept track what was coming and helped set up this morning. I didn't censor the list at all. At the end of last week, it was mostly sugar and junk. I didn't comment directly on their choices, but I did remind them that this was going to be the beginning of their school day and to consider what we've discussed regarding fueling our bodies.

Apparently, the list evolved over the week. This morning, one person brought 2 kinds of chips (hot Cheetos -- a must-have at any middle school pot luck-- and tortilla strips), one person brought microwave popcorn (light), one person brought 2 bottles of soda, and one person brought exactly the right number of cupcakes (and, given the option, SHE decided we should have them at the very end of the day -- I have a mostly self-contained class). BUT the bulk of the table was filled with enchiladas, two kinds of rice, jambalaya, spaghetti with sausage, lumpia, apple juice (flat and sparkling) and a whole case of water! Apparently, we were also supposed to also have crab cakes and salsa (the latter to accompany the aforementioned tortilla strips).

So, yes, according to the 5&1 plan, I "blew it" by sampling the dishes. I'm sure I'm out of the fat burning state and risking a migraine attack (the larger issue in our house). But this feels so much more like a victory! How often does one get to witness 12-year-olds as a group making better choices?!? And undoubtedly there were conversations at home, as well. Some of the choices, as I overheard, were driven by what they knew I wouldn't eat. Hopefully, those decisions will become more intrinsic over time. In the meantime, I'm a role model...cool. I'll take that over another coffee mug any day of the week and twice at Christmas.

[Mike]

My wife the awesome teacher.

[bikipatra]

Congrats on being a great role model. Our children, especially today, need that!

[dede4wd]

How awesome is it to have a job that actually affects young lives?

DeDe

[Diana]

I admit, I got a little caught in an oscillation over the holidays. I'm thinner (and healthier) than I've been more than 20 years, so I gave in to the temptation to stop and look around a bit.

However, in doing so, I tasted my way up to Thanksgiving (but maintained), stayed compliant for about 3 weeks, then when on a full out binge. After the flour settled, I'd gained over 12 lbs back, and it's taken me this long to get it back off.

The question Dr. A and Dan Bell keep asking is always in my mind, "What do you want?" Is it Donica's signature that poses "Discipline is the art of choosing between what you want now and what you really want" ?

I've also finished a great little book, "Repacking Your Bags." (Thanks to Terry and Nancy for this one.) It sets up qualifications for happiness/success thusly: Living in the right place with people you love, doing the right work, on purpose. My dawning is this: before you can determine what your secondary choices are going to be, you have to know what your primary choices/goals/visions are. What do I want?

My life has felt so passive up to this point. There are very few decisions I feel I've made FOR myself in my life. And fewer than that which I've actually, actively, passionately pursued.

What really blows me away is that I've spent the last 15+ years creating visions with and for others professionallys -- where do we want to be as a school, as a district, as a department? And making plans to get there with monitoring processes in place, etc. But for the first time in my life, I'm putting me first. There are places I want to be; I'm planning MY life.

At first, it felt very "unchristian." In fact, just yesterday on a christian radio station we listen to, I heard "Joy is putting Jesus first, other second and yourself last." BUT I've let it get to the point that my body, God's temple, the Lord's vessel became virtually unusable because I didn't take care of it. I was my own doormat, all the while thinking this is what a good christian girl does.

I've been thinking a lot about (meditating on) Romans 12:1 "Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and acceptable to God -- this is your spiritual act of worship."

I realize that Paul is speaking in terms of Salvation and our resulting attitude and action, but are those not also the same activities (attitudes and actions) which lead me to choose food for comfort, entertainment, celebration? Holy and acceptable -- sanctified and pure...and useful. At over 300 lbs., I certainly wasn't useful.

What I want most is to be the living sacrifice Paul describes, a vessel that can max out its potential usefulness in acts of worship. I don't want to have weak handles, to be difficult to move, to be too big for the table it's to sit on but too small to hold what's intended. I want to be a vessel that shines from the patina of daily use. I want to be a vessel characterized by what's constantly spilling out of it. I want it to be one the Lord constantly reaches for in working out His Plan.

The great paradox is that when there's less of me physically (and emotionally), I actually have more to offer as a living sacrifice.

The fun I've been having with the vanity aside, this is truly what I want. This lasting, eternal vision is what will keep me from oscillating and draw me into the structural tension model Fritz describes with progress in one direction -- onward.

[Mike]

I am so glad that we are in this journey together. We can do this, and hopefully, as we help others, God will point us in the direction that He ultimately has for us to go.

[Diana]

February was kind of a difficult month.

I'd been pretty illness-free this school year up to this point. Mike got slammed first, then I got sick, then he got sick again, and I countered with a cluster of migraines. (Gotta love these storms!)

There've been 4 deaths in the last 2ish weeks, two we were close with, the other two were close with folks with whom we're close.

A student at school was struck by a car in the crosswalk in front of the school on Tuesday and was airlifted to the hospital where TonyR works.

We've had district testing in English and Math this week. I teach both to students who are about 3 years behind grade level, so the whole process is quite angst-ridden.

I don't think the morale at school can get any lower. I'm pretty emotionally drained when I get home, and I know exercise will help, but I let the body override the will. Hence, the house is a mess.

Ok, enough moping.

March 16th will mark my anniversary with Take Shape for Life. Some things I've learned:

There's no substitute for compliance!
If I don't like the oatmeal, I don't have to eat the oatmeal.
It's nice to stop and smell the flowers once in a while on this journey, but pretty soon the seasons change, the flowers fade, and the ground gets muddy.
There comes a point when one can simply not put off buying new underthings any longer.
Water is my friend. So is the toilet.
Some people just need a little coaching to sound encouraging.
There's no substitute for compliance!
If you've got a good thing, share it. You never know who needs it, too.
Walking solves a lot of issues and fills a lot of needs.
It really does matter if I look my best when I step out of the house.
Nancy's right -- nothing ever tastes as good as (becoming) thin feels, not even fresh baked sour dough bread with garlic butter and parmesan cheese.
Steering wheels should not be impeded by one's girth.
There's no substitute for compliance!
Being square should not indicate one's dimensions. And both connotations can change.
Most tasks are more fun with a partner (or two or three).
Blessings are individual, Divinely selected for the recipient.
Gratitude is the most important element in having a positive outlook.
Earrings don't care what size you are, so you don't have to get rid of or adjust them when everything else is sliding right off.
There's no substitute for compliance!
One phone call, one opportunity, one decision can change the whole direction of a person's life.
You will always be surrounded by people whom you perceive to be doing better than you. And that's always balanced by one's perception that there are a whole lot of folks doing worse than you, too!
Intelligence is nothing compared with compassion and spirit.
Even 12-year-olds are watching.
The best music is danceable.
There's no substitute for compliance.