The MakeMeThinner Support Forum

[ELK]

Will I ever stop thinking of myself as fat?

So far I have lost over 95 pounds and with about 30 left to goal, I am still overweight but not morbidly obese anymore. When I see myself in a reflective surface, I know I “look” pretty normal now, especially for most Americans. I am fitting in regular sized clothing (because of the darn clothing manufacturers, I range from a size 10 to a baggy 14.)

I am beginning to have routine compliance issues mostly because of my own internal factors but greatly exacerbated by other folks, including my husband, encouraging me to stop. My current height & weight have me in the overweight category, and like many folks here I am aiming for a healthy BMI. I know this is the right thing to do, and I have become firmer in telling people that I plan to stop when I am at a healthy BMI, and I do not plan to become like a stick.

Despite of the weight loss, I still feel like I shouldn’t be shopping in the regular sizes (of course that also may be because I know I’ll have to get smaller sizes soon- - and it’s a waste of money to buy clothes while I am still losing the pounds ). I still feel momentary uneasiness when I board a plane wondering if I’ll still be able to breath after I fasten my seat belt. I still feel self-conscience when people look at me…Is this normal? Will I ever stop obsessing about being “fat”?

[sheri1103]

Congrats on the loss. To answer your question, yes the time will come when you will look in a window or a mirror and all of a sudden that "lightbulb" moment will come. I have found, for me, my impression of myself is twice the size I actually am. I have absorbed all the rude and unkind comments over the years to the point that I actually started believing them. You have lost alot of weight and I applaud your efforts. And stay on the plan that you feel is best for you.

[bikipatra]

Be strong, Elk. You have come so far. Good luck. Sometimes it takes some time for our brains to catch up with our bodies, and the other way around too.

[ELK]

Thank you for yalls support, it helps to know understanding people are out there. Sometimes this weight loss jouney seems to be taking forever and sometimes it seems like it is flying by.

By the way, congrats on entering onederland, Biki. That was one of my favorite days in my journey so far.

[dede4wd]

We are in the same boat. We've lost about the same with about the same to go. What's odd is that when I was big. I thought I was "a little chunky" or "needed some toning." Then the lightbulb turned on that I was FAT and I immediately started doing something about it.

Now that I'm almost "normal..." I don't see it either. I buy a piece of clothing and think there's no way this tag is right, I'm a heffer! I've also stored all those looks and comments and am hoping it just takes my brain a while to catch up to the fact that I'm almost normal. I can't wait for the lightbulb moment, but for now...I see who I was when I look in the mirror.

I talk to the mirror all the time, trying to tell it I'm thinner, much healthier and more attractive now. I do that every day. I'm hoping that each time I do it, it negates one of the comments or looks stored on the hard drive and when we reach even I'll be able to look in the mirror and see what's really there! At least that's my plan!

Just remember how far you've come and how proud of yourself you should be...we are!

DeDe

[bdg]

And just to add another perspective, I asked Joelie tonight when she thought people would begin telling me (as they have told her) that I don't need to lose more. I am starting to have that lightbulb go off at times and I realize it. In clothes I look good, I see it daily (in disbelief), but I see myself also in all my nekkid 'flabbiness' and that seems to dominate my thoughts. It sucks, but I know in time it will change.

[Jan]

Hi there Elk,
It takes a while for our brains to catch up to the fact that we are moving toward a very healthy weight. Our inner eye still remembers our old fluffy selves. It's hard to reprogram our thinking. Even those who have been at a great BMI for a couple years or so sometimes have a hard time believing it. I think it has something to do with us thinking of ourselves as a "fat person" for soo long. Even when we identify ourselves as a bit "chunky" it's still difficult. We are FAT... but then when we lose the poundage it's hard to remember we are no longer fat....
jan

[bikipatra]

I talk to the mirror all the time, trying to tell it I'm thinner, much healthier and more attractive now. I do that every day. I'm hoping that each time I do it, it negates one of the comments or looks stored on the hard drive and when we reach even I'll be able to look in the mirror and see what's really there! At least that's my plan!

DeDe

DE-If you need to be reminded look at that Wonder Woman picture I did of you.