Nickieluv

1 Thread per registered User.

Postby nickieluv » April 3rd, 2009, 7:43 pm

Well I see this is a hot-button issue! And here I was just innocently trying to get a few people to floss. :lol: I will definitely talk with the dentist on Thursday though. Even if you assume it's 2-3, my daughter should be flossing by now. I just know she won't like it. Although it maybe it won't hurt for her - her gums are in much better shape than mine.

And it's a good thing I came on here before going to bed because I would have forgotten all about flossing. Now I will remember.

Today was a tougher day than I expected. I had two bars, both with PB, to try to quiet my hunger. And around 1:30 I entertained the idea of, yes, getting a pizza, but I didn't have enough time before I had to go to my rehearsal thank goodness. Plus a piece of furniture I ordered arrived and it was 'assembly required' so that kept me busy. I wound up with two meals left to eat still at 8pm, but I didn't go more than 3 hours between eating all day. Just worked out that way. So I'm having my last shake and then (brushing and flossing and) going to bed.

I guess I should say that I'm not being 100% plan-compliant. I'm having a bit of PB with a bar sometimes (although I am not having a gigantic spoonful like I used to do, but more like an actual two tablespoons instead of a quarter of a cup or something). And I'm not having just the veggies on the list. We do frozen veggies and broccoli and green beans get very boring for the rest of the family - so my husband checks the calorie content of the bagged veggies and gets what is similar to broccoli. Although I just remembered that carbs count, too - I'll have to make sure those are close as well. I'm not having peas and carrots by themselves, but sometimes we'll make stir-fry mixed veggies and they have the odd pea and some shredded carrots in them. There are also shredded carrots in my bagged salad (because the kind without them is twice as expensive).

It makes things less boring. And I suppose it will give me more areas to look at cutting back on when I stall out. But now I have been completely honest about it. It probably doesn't matter to anybody else, but I felt a little nagging at my conscience saying I'd been perfect for 6 days now. Because it hasn't been totally perfect. But each day I have not broken any of the rules I set for myself by having pizza or pasta or potatoes or any other 'p' foods. Hey, I could market a new diet - don't eat any food that starts with a 'p'. No pretzels, popcorn, potato chips, pork, pineapple.... People will try anything - I bet I could make a fortune.... :lol:
User avatar
nickieluv
Preferred Member - #10 Club
 
Posts: 2703
Joined: June 21st, 2006, 4:09 pm
Location: Central New York

Postby katieb920 » April 4th, 2009, 6:01 am

Girl You are doing it. I am so proud of you. You know you can do this. Keep it up. One day at a time. Just think of all the benefits you are going to have at the end of this journey.
Katie
User avatar
katieb920
Preferred Member - 60# Club
 
Posts: 2173
Joined: January 28th, 2006, 2:24 pm
Location: New Jersey

Postby nickieluv » April 4th, 2009, 11:12 am

Well I forgot that 'peanut butter' starts with a 'p' - maybe on purpose I forgot?

I'm struggling today. I just want to go massively off. I had two supplements within an hour - 8:30 and 9:30. I feel stressed and hungry and very angry all the time for no apparent reason. I'm trying to calm down but I am flying off the handle about every tiny thing.

I had two peanut butter and chocolate sandwiches at 10:30 - oh so nutritious - and I had one SweeTart chick piece of candy just now at about 2. I'm trying to contain the damage by not eating until dinner, and then having a L&G and calling it a day. But it's tough. Seems like it just snuck right up on me. I know it's not about the food, it's emotional - the anger, fatigue, stress - but as Karli says that's no excuse - although it's a reason, but those aren't the same thing. I can have reasons for my behavior but hopefully I can avoid trying to justify naughtiness.

I'm going to be on tomorrow but I am leaving open the option of an off-plan dinner. We are taking the girls to a Playhouse Disney show and we have gift certificates from Christmas to a restaurant that's on the way home - so we might stop. I'm not saying I will, but I'm leaving it open and hoping that will help me get back to being good today. It doesn't have to be the end of the world if I do have a proper dinner and move on. That is my plan. And for once coming here to type about it hasn't made me feel like doing the exact opposite. So that's good news.

I'm going to go hit the fluids because I'm sure that will help too. Maybe I'll have some pickles. I can make it past today and not ruin everything. So I will.
User avatar
nickieluv
Preferred Member - #10 Club
 
Posts: 2703
Joined: June 21st, 2006, 4:09 pm
Location: Central New York

Postby Karli » April 4th, 2009, 11:46 am

Hi Nickie,

Well, I hope that for some reason I didn't influence you about that ! One thing I have noticed this time around on MF is that my resolve to get right back on doesn't change (AT ALL). I am truly serious about losing the weight, but I will admit, sometimes I get *really* bored of eating basically the same old things every single day. But, I also see that I seem to have issues with truly restricting myself when it has come to me trying to eat balanced regular meals ! Otherwise I wouldn't be in this position of wanting/needing to lose the weight that I need to.

If I didn't think MF was the right way to go about this, I would stop again. But, I know it works and somehow my head is still in the game (as crazy as that sounds !). So, I am sticking with it.

I read an online article from "Body for Life" and I started getting jealous of the meal plan as 4 out of six of the meals are "real food" and includes natural carbs instead of balanced ready made meals. Plus, on the 7th day you have a day off. Just reading that convinced me that I deserved a day off ... which, in some ways I think is fine, so long as it doesn't affect the overall resolve, which in the past it *always* has.

My main point is that there are a number of ways to go about losing the weight, and even if there are intermittent breaks from MF, what really matters ultimately, I believe, is holding the resolve. I think part of that is actually knowing how long you will be off and how long you will be on, YOU deciding that, and really having the ability to stick with it. You know that too much off-roading will just be frustrating. And, by now, you probably know how much that is.

Anyway, let's get them poundies off !! :)
Karli
Preferred Member - #50 Club
 
Posts: 1658
Joined: June 24th, 2006, 11:20 pm

Postby nickieluv » April 5th, 2009, 5:18 pm

So here is why I was proud of myself yesterday.

Yes, I had the PB/choc sandwiches. Other than that, and my L&G (which I did have according to the rules), I had 8 saltines and about as many SweeTart chicks/ducks/bunnies. I was still down today from yesterday! But the thing is, usually after a slip I would head out to McDonald's or something because I'd already screwed up. Yesterday was more about acknowledging what I'd done and containing the damage.

Today, I continued the same idea at dinner by not having regular soda even though the sugar would have been nice. I stuck with diet. We ate out and I had a burger, some fries, and some chips with cheese dip. I could have gone lighter for the meal with grilled chicken and rice and in hindsight I wish I had - none of it was so great that it was worth what's probably going to happen on the scale now. Other than dinner, I had 4 of the chicks/ducks/bunnies when we got home - and a cup of light strawberry yogurt was all I had before we left. I know I should have eaten more than that in the morning (skipped breakfast totally) but time got away from me. Sundays are hectic, and even more so now with Easter coming up next week.

So this is a departure for me to not stuff myself into oblivion - although I do still wish we'd had enough money to stop at the soft-serve place for ice cream sundaes. But there will be other times. I don't feel bloated or gross at all. Yay!

Oh, and we're going back to Disney again in August.

I know, I know - but if you've seen the commerical you know it was almost impossible to resist the deal this time!!! I'm hoping to be under 200 by then, and I'm not going to waste time like I did for the eight months prior to the last excursion. Back on tomorrow, energetically and without regret, and I want to try to get at least 7 days on plan without any more slips. That's my mini-goal. That and, of course, losing 5 more pounds this week. Off I go!!
User avatar
nickieluv
Preferred Member - #10 Club
 
Posts: 2703
Joined: June 21st, 2006, 4:09 pm
Location: Central New York

Postby MyComplete180 » April 6th, 2009, 11:36 am

Darn those bunnies, chicks and ducks. I was filling eggs for the hunt and absent mindedly put one in my mouth and as soon as I realized I did a PHEW and spit it out, my husband looked at me like I was on drugs...it was funny.

Old habits for me are HARD, forget my hanging out with anyone who smokes my old brand, because I will just light up, and it's been years.

Happy Happy Disney, the deals are killer right now, we want to go as well, but get agravated because the good deals are for 4 and we have 5 and it seems to realy jump in price with 5.

Anyhow, keep strong...
Image
User avatar
MyComplete180
Preferred Member - #30 Club
 
Posts: 191
Joined: March 27th, 2009, 2:42 am

Postby nickieluv » April 6th, 2009, 12:53 pm

I've noticed that price jump, too. We have 5 technically but one is an infant, so we're still OK. The oldest (my step) is heading off to college in the fall so it will be a nice last hurrah for him. Funny, in 12 years we've never been on vacation and now twice in one year!

Booked it up today - fun fun fun!

Funny story about the chicks, 180 - that's how the first one found it's way into my mouth on Saturday, and after that it got easier to reach for more. :lol: It's been hard to want to stay on plan today. I have, but if my husband didn't come home early to watch baseball, and if I had any money to speak of, I'm pretty sure I would have caved and ordered food. I don't think it's anything more than just being enormously tired today. I've already planned ahead to go to bed right after the little ones do, at about 8 or even sooner. And I've had no caffeine today to keep me up. Although I might have a little hit before piano lessons to keep me going for all four of them.

Once today is over, hopefully tomorrow will be easier with some sleep in me. I was up four pounds today, and still up three of them by mid-afternoon. Not a big surprise because I went back to old habits a bit late last night. I didn't get my ice cream, you know, so it just kept nagging at me - until I had two cheese sandwiches and two PB/choc sandwiches within an hour of each other. I should have just had the PB to begin with - I had the cheese because I was trying to avoid so much sugar. Although all we had was white bread which is practically sugar anyway, so I shouldn't have worried so much I guess and saved myself the cheese calories.

Well, still - Saturday at least was better than it could have been. And I will try to remember next time that a dinner out can be just as delicious without being loaded with fat and cheese. I wish I'd gotten the grilled chicken and rice. Next time I hope I remember to go with lighter fare. Because I'm pretty sure there will be a next time - although there doesn't HAVE to be. But we are going to dinner at a colleague's house on Saturday and I don't know them well enough to want to get into the whole special diet food thing - so I will just do my best and hope there's something compliant there. Although being Lent, and them being Catholic, probably not going to find a L&G unless they do fish.

Well, off to get my jolt of caffeine before lessons arrive. Then dinner, wait a bit, last supplement, and off to blissful dreamland.
User avatar
nickieluv
Preferred Member - #10 Club
 
Posts: 2703
Joined: June 21st, 2006, 4:09 pm
Location: Central New York

Postby oksoonergirl26 » April 6th, 2009, 4:17 pm

I totally sympathize with the chicks and bunnies. I have to go to Easter dinner at my mom's and she always buys me two bags of the Cadbury mini-eggs (they are my ultimate favorite candy). I will try to be strong. This is the first day I have actually felt hungry and I am wanting to eat something carby right now-but I am trying to refrain! Good luck for the rest week-I wish I could go to Disney World!
3/18/09
228/175/125
User avatar
oksoonergirl26
Preferred Member - 70# Club
 
Posts: 496
Joined: March 20th, 2009, 5:32 pm
Location: McKinney, TX

Postby nickieluv » April 7th, 2009, 8:48 am

The thing is, I don't even really like them. My husband bought two bags because HE loves them. Had they actually been Cadbury's I would never have been able to resist as long as I did in the first place. :lol:
User avatar
nickieluv
Preferred Member - #10 Club
 
Posts: 2703
Joined: June 21st, 2006, 4:09 pm
Location: Central New York

Postby Karli » April 9th, 2009, 8:38 pm

Hey Nickie, how's it going for ya ?
Karli
Preferred Member - #50 Club
 
Posts: 1658
Joined: June 24th, 2006, 11:20 pm

Postby nickieluv » April 10th, 2009, 7:38 pm

Reading, posting, but studiously avoiding coming to my own journal for now.... :(
User avatar
nickieluv
Preferred Member - #10 Club
 
Posts: 2703
Joined: June 21st, 2006, 4:09 pm
Location: Central New York

Postby Karli » April 11th, 2009, 2:09 pm

Okay, Nickie. Just don't be avoiding your own self ... studiously or otherwise. :)
Karli
Preferred Member - #50 Club
 
Posts: 1658
Joined: June 24th, 2006, 11:20 pm

Postby nickieluv » April 12th, 2009, 7:49 pm

Oh, I'm not gone. Can't afford to be gone. But I'm starting to wonder if I might not need some form of punishment to keep myself on the straight and narrow. I know, ruling by fear doesn't really work long-term. Especially with my tendency to rebel against any and all food rules.

Just kind of eating whatever over here. Nothing unusual. Part of me wants to start up tomorrow, part of me doesn't. The really sad part is that I KNOW once I see some good weight loss - 30 pounds or so - and I see and feel a difference in my clothes fitting and my energy level - I won't want to stop or give up. It just seems darn near impossible to get there right now. Whatever I say to myself, I seem to do the opposite.

There are still 5 weeks left in this musical (I miscounted before, so it's still 5, not 4) and that is enough time to see good progress. That is also coincidentally my birthday weekend. I'll be 31. Yay me.

When I lost those 70 pounds - that was the first time in my life, other than puberty, that I ever lost weight. I'd gained and gained for about ten years before finally being successful at losing more than 5 or 10 pounds. I had no idea how to maintain that loss. I know I've learned from the experience, and I feel like my priority right now should be getting down to goal and sitting there for a few months before any other major life changes occur. But I've had this 'child timing' thing worked out for 5 years now and it is so hard for me to let go of that plan. But I've basically ensured that it can't happen. IF I had actually gotten it done starting last August, I might be approaching goal by now. It doesn't bear thinking about.

I think I will start tomorrow. Just try. A few minutes at a time if need be. Have lots of water. Maybe exercise. Sometimes that helps me stay in the right mindset.

I've decided that I want to run. Ten years from now I want to pop out of the house before work and jog/run around the neighborhood, wearing my size 8 workout clothes, then glam up, go to work, feed my body healthy foods instead of junk, and be a mom my kids can be proud of on the soccer field or in the dance hall or wherever their interests place me as an audience member.

The thing is, I know nothing about it. I don't know how to start. How to work up to it. Incline? None? How fast? Jog till I think I'm going to die? Just do thirty-second sprints? I have no idea. But I want to make a running goal and work towards it every day. I want to run. With the freedom of a child chasing a ball. I want to feel light and unencumbered. Hmmm. Maybe I've hit on something psychological there. Maybe I am feeling weighted down by a lot more than just my own physical presence.

Well, tomorrow is a new day. I know I can do this. I can do whatever the hell I want. I feel the need to be fierce about this. Not wishy-washy. Get ready to kick some tail. Be strong. Make a goal and pursue it relentlessly. But, avoid thinking about the diet. Like Scatter wrote, make it rote. Not a part of my day that requires thought. My goal needs to be something else, something shorter term, something that losing weight is a part of only peripherally.

I just go on and on, of course. Time to stop writing for now. Check ya later.
User avatar
nickieluv
Preferred Member - #10 Club
 
Posts: 2703
Joined: June 21st, 2006, 4:09 pm
Location: Central New York

Postby nickieluv » April 12th, 2009, 7:53 pm

Hey, it's not all bad though. I've flossed EVERY DAY except for the night I had my cavity filled - because the dentist told me to be extra careful of it for at least 8 hours while it set firmly and I was afraid to go near it. I suppose I could have flossed AROUND the filling but.... And, he said my gums already looked better. So how's everybody else doing at flossing? You might all get thin, but I'll keep my own teeth even if I never lose a pound thank you very much. :lol:
User avatar
nickieluv
Preferred Member - #10 Club
 
Posts: 2703
Joined: June 21st, 2006, 4:09 pm
Location: Central New York

Postby MyComplete180 » April 12th, 2009, 7:55 pm

Forgot to say I FLOSSED too 8)

Okay only two days, but the were two days in the same week :?
Image
User avatar
MyComplete180
Preferred Member - #30 Club
 
Posts: 191
Joined: March 27th, 2009, 2:42 am

PreviousNext

Return to My Journal



 


  • Related topics
    Replies
    Views
    Last post

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 0 guests

cron