Still all good in maintenanceland...

Lauren

Hey, gang!

I have been a bit remiss this last week or two in posting, and while I haven't been a daily poster since even before I hit goal, I worry that if I don't drop by frequently, people will think I've fallen off plan.

No worries! No falling. Still all good in maintenanceland!

Still doing my crazy running thing. I wish I could say I was one of those zen runners who just goes off into my own lalaland and doesn't realize how far I'm running, but I am the opposite. I am aware of every step, every calorie I'm burning, every mile I complete. I love the run for the symbolism - that it's something I could never do while fat, and that every step I take is a step towards improving my health and fitness, and a step AWAY from who I was. So, whether I am running outside by the river or park or inside on a treadmill, I am completely focused on time/calories/mileage all the time - and I like it! Yes, I sound totally OCD. No suprise. Ha! My long runs keep getting longer, I am just about scraping the 9 mile mark, but I have been doing a lot more speed and hill work recently, trying to mix it up, change the pattern, keep the ol' body guessing, and it's fun!

If I have a day where I just don't feel like running, I don't torture myself, I do the elliptical instead! I have weird OCD things on the elliptical too. Like, I love hitting number goals - getting to 10,000 strides was supercool, don't know why, just liked it! I do speed intervals on the elliptical, and continue to try to increase the resistance as well. Whatever works!

Food is pretty darn consistent, no surprise there. I don't tend to mix it up, especially on the weekdays, but the weekends, what with brunches and dinners with friends, the meals vary, but while I allow myself more flexibility with types of foods or a little bit of sauce or such, I still don't do the totally off stuff like desserts or bread or anything. It just causes me anxiety, and I like the feeling of control over my eating - I get stressed that if I jump off into "that other world," there may be no going back. Hey, it's totally possible that I'll be fine and able to control it, but what if I'm not? And, the way I see it, since I truly do love and enjoy the healthy guilt-free foods, I'd rather just stick to them and be content in my sense of control.

Will this change down the road? Maybe. But not necessarily. I have found it is truly easy to eat anywhere and make healthy choices that don't include sweets (candy, chocolate, cake, ice cream) or bread/rice/pasta. I have incorporated sweet potatoes into my diet, but pretty much only as a post-run high-carb fuel food, not generally as part of a dining experience. Someone offered me some butter-free popcorn yesterday, and while I absolutely can have that, I am thinking it might be atrigger food, because there's no way I'd ever be able to only eat the allowed serving size - I used to go through an entire microwave bag without thinking!

So, yes, I am doing great, feeling great, um, well, I guess looking great (you know what I mean), and emotionally sound and stable, but I still have to be vigilant about food, and I think I always will. That's just a reminder to any of you who think they just want to get to goal and won't have to think about it ever again - lucky you if it's true, but not likely! :-)

Ciao, people!

Lauren

Hyperion · Posted: Fri Oct 12, 2007 8:23 am Post subject:

Lauren, let me answer to this thread as I think it applies to me too!

Gotta love running too! I bought a dog last year, Jack Russell breed (those things are FAST), and I run with him a few times a week. I even do rollerblade and he keeps up with me. Those beasts never are tired. I have to learn from them

Now let me share my experience with the dark side of the food. For more than one year I was a control freak with food (no offense, it's actually a compliment)... I allowed myself sometimes off foods, but I was greatly in control of quantity. However, I've been doing gym for about 2 months now, and I lost this control. You know, the "post-workout urge". From there, when you eat "off" one time, you do it twice, then often. Then, you make yourselves excuses, saying you'll do more training, how you are hungry now and need more food to compensate for cardio, etc etc... It's crazy how you can fall off rapidly!

That's where I am now. As you saw in the pictures, I'm not "fat", but I took some weight (actually 25 pounds), which some of them is muscle and some of them is fat! What I want is to reduce the fat I have (clearly visible to me around the belly!!!!!). I think the key is to come back to my strict nutrition control I had before (I say strict but you and I both know it's just a habit question). When you get used to eat healthy, you don't crave anymore for sweets.

Keep us posted and all other comments are welcome. It may be awkward, but this forum is more than helpful when thinking about nutrition control... In front of bread or sweets, I remind myself "Hmmm what would Lauren, Jo do?" or "Oh, gosh if I slip, I'll have to explain myself and I'll get scolded by my MF buddies!"

Keep up the good work

Serendipity · Posted: Fri Oct 12, 2007 8:35 am Post subject:

DntCryLilEmoGrl · Posted: Fri Oct 12, 2007 8:44 am Post subject:

bikipatra · Posted: Fri Oct 12, 2007 9:13 am Post subject:

Don't worry Lauren. I was under no such illusion.

Lauren · Posted: Fri Oct 12, 2007 9:16 am Post subject:

Biks, you most certainly weren't one of the folks I was worried about...you're hardly a head in the clouds chick, and you haven't romanticized any part of this process, including maintenance! That's why I KNOW you'll be successful!

Lauren

bikipatra · Posted: Fri Oct 12, 2007 9:25 am Post subject:

Lauren · Posted: Fri Oct 12, 2007 9:39 am Post subject:

Ha. Can you send that out as a memo to everyone I know? Clients and colleagues, especially.

Lauren

LAwoman · Posted: Sun Oct 14, 2007 2:57 pm Post subject:

"...but I still have to be vigilant about food, and I think I always will. That's just a reminder to any of you who think they just want to get to goal and won't have to think about it ever again - lucky you if it's true, but not likely!"

EXACTLY why I gained back the lbs. I had lost on my first MF bout, and why I had so much trouble restarting.

Thanks for speaking the truth. And I am thrilled to see you doing so well leading your healthy life.

My new motto I've been thinking about whenever I'm interested in "offplan" food is - If I want to be a thin person throughout life, I need to eat like a thin person throughout life (whether I'm MFing or not)

Lauren · Posted: Tue Oct 16, 2007 6:55 am Post subject:

Thanks, LA Woman! Yeah, it's all such a head trip, right? There are very few women here in the US who don't have issues surrounding food, even the thin ones. I always figured they just didn't think about it - turns out, they do! Some of them only had to start thinking about it when they became adults, but now that I've entered the "secret society of the thin" (ha!), I am SO suddenly aware that EVERYONE is disfunctional! All this time I thought my thin friends and family were confident and comfortable in their bodies and their eating, but they compare themselves to everyone!

You know what's really odd and slightly amusing? Because I struggled with my weight my whole life, I never bothered comparing myself (physically) to any other women. I am competitive in spirit, in my career, in my success in education, in leadership roles, but I never compared myself to my peers in terms of my body, because that would have been, well, traumatizing. So, it turns out, now I actually have a HEALTHIER body image than my friends? I've become a witness to how they actually think (they didn't include me in talks of people's bodies like this when I was fat), and while they're all comparing, I'm still not! Amazing how things happen, huh?

Just a funny side note, I guess.

Cheers!

Lauren

Hyperion · Posted: Tue Oct 16, 2007 7:12 am Post subject:

Mickeyz · Posted: Tue Oct 16, 2007 7:19 am Post subject:

Lauren,
It is so nice to have your posts to read! I am only 2 lbs from goal now, but I know I will need to be more diligent than ever through an extended transistion and also ever after...but just because I'll have a new way of eating doesn't mean it won't be "happily ever after"

I am determined to never put this weight back on. You are a great example. I think I am finally getting my mind around the fact that life isn't about what foods I can or can not eat! Being a healthy weight and feeling great are such huge rewards for me. Thanks again for your terrific example.

Lauren · Posted: Tue Oct 16, 2007 7:54 am Post subject:

Hey, Hype and Mickey!

Hype, you are totally right, women are cruel to one another, but more importantly, are cruel to ourselves! And while certainly I hated that my obesity made me stand out from an aesthetic standpoint, the fact that I couldn't climb the stairs or keep up with my friends while going out, or even just EXIST without breaking a sweat, these were the true reasons I wanted to lose the weight. But to be fair, all the reasons are valid, if the only reason someone wants to lose weight is to feel better amongst other women, that's truly okay. We have the right to want to feel pretty and desirable, and the power to make it happen. And while our self esteem should not be entirely wrapped up in our appearances, it is only natural that some of it is, that's our society, and we exist in it. So don't judge the lovely ladies, Hype, who just want to be lovelier, instead help them to see the qualities that ALREADY make them beautiful, and support them in their efforts to complete the package! :-)

Mickey, I am so psyched for you and how close you are to goal! You have been outstanding throughout the process, and you've always seemed to have a really grounded view of the long term, so I have no doubt that you'll have success in the maintenance process. By all means drop me a line if you have any questions, need support, whatever. I'm not here all the time, but I do try to be here enough to be responsive!

Just remember that as you start to experiment with new foods or new volumes of foods, you may have moments of genuine fear, or of the feeling of losing control and stepping into a possible binge-zone. Just pull back the reigns, and remember that you don't HAVE to eat certain things, it's not like a true test of a successful maintainer means you can eat a slice of cake and not want more. A successful maintainer is someone who manages their weight loss, and eats in a way that fulfills them, physically and mentally. Only you can figure out what those terms are, so while we all have paths that you can draw from, you will figure out what works for you. Maybe it is a slice of cake every day. Maybe, like me, you'll decide you want absurd amounts of brussel sprouts (yeah, some weird phase I'm going through, don't ask, ha!). Just do what feels right, what keeps you in control, and what makes you feel like you can do this for the long haul!

You're so close, I can taste it!

Lauren

Hyperion · Posted: Tue Oct 16, 2007 8:22 am Post subject:

bikipatra · Posted: Tue Oct 16, 2007 9:07 am Post subject: